Bittersweet Days

Everything in this world has an upside and a downside
Like waking in the morning.
Like this morning.
I woke up with a steady resolution but my heart waver for a bit.
Sorry, a lot.
Then I recollected about the sins I committed these past few days,
and found even more worries, so I stopped my own thoughts and move.

I forgot my wallet on my way to my destination, came back and went to other appointment I made, only to be troubled by something even more grave.

I made a mistake reading the instructions about bureaucracy and
that either:
a. Cost me a year to waste, but no financial obligation
b. Cost me a year and a financial obligation
c. Cost me a little time to play inside the intestines of bureaucracy and a grave amount of money, but I won't have to waste a year

Those shitty options are all I got left






And after picking C, it happened that my case couldn't be helped, and I've to chose option A.
I just want to cry and all, but can't find the right moment and place to do it.
I won't give up et, and try to push option C until the very last line of defense.
Please pray for me.